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Hi, I’m Laura.

Welcome to Clean Love. This is a space where I share my musings on love, sex, and relationships. Thanks for stopping by.

What do you think is the most skipped step in opening up a relationship?⁣

What do you think is the most skipped step in opening up a relationship?⁣

What do you think is the most skipped step in opening up a relationship?⁣

HINT: It's not...⁣
Discussing exactly how your open relationship will be structured⁣
Writing down limits, boundaries, rules, and expectations⁣
Nailing those dating profiles⁣
Reading books (Ever read The Ethical Slut?)⁣
Listening to podcasts (still love you @whitnlove)⁣

Really... "The most skipped step in the entire process isn’t even especially a step you have to take in opening up your relationship, but in making sure you remain an individual within a relationship."-medium.com/@polyamoryschool <-- Give this a read⁣

You heard that right! The biggest problem newly open couples have is codependency. Oftentimes, couples cease to think of themselves as individuals in favor of a unit. Spending time together becomes a default. ⁣

Open relationships thrive when a couple is able to disentangle their lives (Don’t worry you can still live together!) Try picking random evenings to spend apart. Start asking each other out on dates again. Leaving a little room to miss each other can be a good thing.⁣

Open/Poly/Nonmonogamous stuff is hard. For those trying it or thriving in it, what helped the most for you? For those not doing it, what seems like the scariest part?⁣

(Disclaimer: Nonmonogamy is not for everyone nor do I recommend that everyone try it. I am not a therapist or a professional and all of my writing comes from research and personal experience)

Wow, that's a lot of work.

Wow, that's a lot of work.

Are you intentionally avoiding conflict in your relationships?

Are you intentionally avoiding conflict in your relationships?