Love As A Pessimist
Love as a pessimist
A lapse in the suffering of day to day. Find the one that makes you miserable the least.
Please don’t leave me.
It comes in waves that engulf you, then, sinks back till all that's left is the sea foam tickling your toes. (Or stinging that shaving cut on your ankle you forgot about)
It’s an obligation, an obsession. Until it’s time to come up for air.
A rollercoaster drop sensation in the pit of your stomach. Oh no. What have I done? No going back now. A whisper of shame. Now you’re humming along to songs you swore you never liked. You daydreams of sunshine, soft grass and picnic baskets. Blankets and hot pots of soup stewing all day and spicing the air.
What did I do to deserve this?
I lied to you. For a long, long time. Promises were broken. Plans were cancelled. Oh yeah, I bought us concert tickets for November.
Can I still call you when I’m drunk? Do you have to tell your mom?
The weight of guilt.
I messed up.